Category: Breaking chains

Define Your Boundaries

 

“David defeated them there. And he said, ‘The Lord has broken through my enemies before me like a breaking flood.’” 2 Samuel 5:20

 

The boundaries we set for ourselves determine the direction of our lives. Boundaries and leadership are subtle teachings throughout the Bible.  That’s one reason why we can read a Bible verse one day then read something much more in-depth with that same verse on another day. But, even with that, certain ideas about this came to mind when I was doing my morning Bible study recently.

Know Which Boundaries (Borders) are Changeable.

King David, more often than not, was the one defining his own boundaries. His style of assertive leadership is why we still study him to this very day. It’s clear that David was not a “head-strong” reckless person. His life was not marked by selfish desires. Instead, he sought God’s will for his life on a regular basis.

David thought out his steps wisely enough, throughout most of his entire life. He escaped great danger to himself and his men multiple times. He even abdicated his kingly throne once rather than go to war against his own son who sought to take his dad’s place on the throne.

Even in the beginning of David’s adulthood, he had to run for his life from King Saul’s tirades. But, while “being on the run” several hundred men followed David’s lead faithfully. Just think of the responsibility of feeding all of them even just once a day.

When I read about David’s life it seems that he could’ve easily been overwhelmed with fear, responsibility, and other trails that go with leadership positions. But, even when he herded sheep as a teenager he did not flinch at the constant responsibility of protecting his father’s sheep from wild animals.

However, in the above-mentioned verse we still David who had just been crowned King over Israel, making important decisions by seeking God’s advice first. He was in his mid-thirties by this time.  And on this particular day that the verse is referring to David knew he was out numbered and his men were not well equipped for battle.

But, still he had to decide on whether to go to war or not. This was when his reign had just gotten started. What a great way to start ruling over several thousand people, and multiple towns. When he felt confident on receiving God’s answer, then David went to war.

The odds were against him and his “rag-tag” army in many ways. He, himself, had been on the run for his own life against King Saul for about fifteen years prior to this moment.  When David was still in his teens King Saul had brought him into the palace to play his harp. Music was the one thing that calmed Saul down. But, when he was in a bad mood he tried to kill or have others kill David (1 Sam. 19:1).

Now it was David’s turn to be King of Israel. His reign had began on a rocky note. Much like his whole life had been up to that point. When David was in his early teens’ he’d been anointed king over Israel. All of this had happened when Saul was in the middle years of his reign as king over Israel. But King Saul didn’t know anything about David when the teenager was asked to play his harp for the royal court.

In the fifteen-plus years later God had put David through several experiences that were meant to sharpen his leadership abilities and expand his own outlook on life. Or in other words David’s natural borders increased. Sometimes it happened by necessity and sometimes it happened by him seeking God’s will in things.

Now, it was his time to lead, but he didn’t know which way to go. He sought God’s guidance. He could play it safe and tell his few hundred men to go back home. Or he could rally his army to run toward the battle. He chose to run toward the battle.

This event had been such a defining experience for him that David had a vision of an earthen brim breaking forth from an overflow of water. He saw God using plain old water to force what seemed strong and unbreakable to fall apart and wash down the river in chunks of clay, boulders, and logs.

In his youth David had been a simple shepherd boy who was not even mentioned by his own Earthly father, but only as an afterthought.  David had no real importance in the family hierarchy throughout his childhood.

However, God saw the leader that was inside David. That’s why God’s Spirit was poured out on him all the days of his life.

The power and control you seek defines your borders. Your borders define the style of leadership and direction in your own life.

“Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers. And the Spirit of the Lord rushed upon David from that day forward.”  1 Samuel 16:13

 

 

 

 

The Good Samaritans

“Jesus answered, “…a man who was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho when robbers attacked him,…leaving him half dead….

But a Samaritan who was traveling that way…saw him, his heart was filled with pity. He went over to him, poured oil and wine on his wounds and bandaged them; then he put the man on his own animal and took him to an inn, where he took care of him.” Luke 10:30,33,34

Before I settled down to marry my husband and have my three girls, I was a restless young woman moving from place to place and job to job. I was in my early twenties during those years, and living in Atlanta GA.

I had moved there when I was nineteen to learn photography at an art school. It was located near Pershing Point, so my parents helped me find a nearby place. As it turned out I lived between where “Gone With The Wind” was written and Piedmont Park. l mention this because those two places were at opposite ends of polarizing cultures at that time if ever there was.

The book was written in a peaceful quiet neighborhood. Piedmont Park at that time, was ran over with dirty hippies that camped there, smoked dope, and dealt drugs out in the open. Small children ran around with little direction. That was the summer of 1971. About a year later the Atlanta police cracked down and cleared the Park out.

I bought dope there at the Park while finishing my year of study. After that I worked in photo labs around Atlanta and moved often to be closer to work. And I continued my habit of smoking dope. All that put me in the company of some people who didn’t have my nor their own best interests in mind.

By the Spring of 1975 I realized I could no longer continue in that lifestyle. I was seeking a new direction for my life. I began seeking God’s presence in my life like I had experienced in my childhood.

From that desire I found a local church that was warm and friendly from the start. During that same time, I also was trying to get into a branch of the military but had failed the first round of testing. My math skills were lacking to say the least.

On my life’s horizon came two women that were a great help to me during that time. The first was my sister Deena who had left a federal job in D.C. to move to Atlanta a year earlier. Deena was much more of a career person than I’ve ever been. She gave me advice and encouraged me to keep trying to join the military that year.

The other woman came out from a large crowd of friendly people at my church and showed an interest in me. We had little in common, but I appreciated her friendship. On a Sunday afternoon after having lunch together at my apartment she turned our conversation to the state of my spiritual life.

That’s when God used a sledgehammer to break the hardness of my heart. In between crying I made it clear enough that my whole life was still pretty much a mess. I was still smoking dope and being “on the fence” over everything in my life.

My friend allowed the Holy Spirit to guide her and I sensed that. Otherwise, I would’ve insisted she leave immediately. After all, I had a nice veneer of an organized Spiritual life going on. But that’s all it was, and I knew it. It was time to jump off the “fence” and make a commitment to be a Christ follower.

I flushed all the dope I had in my apt and then we prayed. After that we talked about my wanting to join the military. I knew my friend was a college student but hadn’t ask what her major was.

I had centered much of my life around me, myself, and I back then and showed little interest in getting to know others on an in-depth relationship.

It was that day when she told me she had left her steady job, worked a plan out with her mother to help raise her daughter. And had moved closer to Georgia Tech University to pursue some type of a math degree. Soon she would be graduating and returning to get her child to pursue a new career plan.

We only knew each other for a few weeks at best. But before graduating, she wrote a full sheet of simple math formulas that I read and practiced over and over. By late Summer I went into the Air Force Recruiting station and passed their tests with above average abilities in understanding basic schematics, math, and comprehension skills.

I entered the Air Force on a delayed enlistment plan in 1976. By 1978 I had met and married another Air Force member, Jeffrey Jordan. We have three daughters that we’re very proud of.

God Did His Best Work When He Created You and I

Joshua said to them, “Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Be strong and courageous.” Joshua 10:25

 

Have you ever thought that when God created you and I, He was doing His best work? Its true. And hopefully you believe that and will show others you’re one of His masterpieces. That’s what my goal is each and every day I awake to a new day in my life.

Like me, maybe you’ve also picked up negative messages about yourself during your childhood years.  If so, then you, like I have emotionally engulfed that negativity into our psyche, and then it became a part of our own self-belief.

Well, those that spoke those messages are also flawed humans just like the rest of us. My dad constantly criticized me all through my childhood and into my adult years. But that’s how he always spoke to all five of his children. I love him, but I’ve learned over the years to take being in his presence in small doses.

I was criticized by both my parents during my childhood. Which might be the root cause of the dysthimic depression I’ve had most of my adult life. Looking back I can say that it’s been a journey of going through some dark valleys of depression.

I didn’t know what kind of depression I had, but I did know that it “clouded” my thinking. So, in my early twenties I started making changes in my life that were for my good. Prior to that I had been heading in a downward spiral since my teens.

A lot of that changed though, when I set my mind on improving my life about the time I turned twenty-three. I got new friends, for one thing. I, also had my Christian “born again” experience then, and grew in my spiritual walk. Within a year, I joined the USAF, and met my husband, Jeff at my first Airbase assignment.

But, the depression I’ve experienced didn’t just magically go away then, or any other time. First, I had to recognize my own symptoms and then, for far too long, I just learned to live with it. What has helped me is the counseling I’ve received.

God has never created anyone who was, is, or will be less than His best creation. I know that to be true. And I hope you will believe that also. I have always believed it to be true about my children, grandchildren, my husband Jeff, and myself. This doesn’t make us perfect, by any means though.

Even blatantly evil people, didn’t start out being evil, they became that way through their conscious and sub-conscious decisions about themselves.

The  question we need to ask ourselves is, “Are you or I living up to all that God has made us to be?” You may not feel that you are doing that right now. You are the one who can change it though.

Depression has rob me of my joy for life more times than I want to think about. When I did try counseling, it seemed the counselor could never pinpoint what was wrong with me. Finding the right counselor has been a journey in itself.

But, even without having a therapist, I have always found the strength I needed for each day by reading and meditating on God’s word. By doing that I finally pulled out of those “valleys of the shadow.” (Psalms 23:4).

You have potential in you that you’ve yet to reach the limit of. Life itself is constantly evolving. We’re not even aware of what half of our future goals and accomplishments are going to be.

Life will have its disappointments, to be sure. But that might be an opportunity for you to change your life’s path. Be flexible with your goals. Strengthen your resolve to be a better decision maker next time around.

Believe in yourself and make decisions that will put you on a positive track for your life. Don’t follow the group. And don’t be manipulated by a charismatic personality that just wants you around to feed their own insecure ego.

Read about great leaders. Let quality people mentor you through their writings or their life’s story written by someone else. When Dwight Eisenhower was a teenager growing up in Abilene, Kansas he began setting goals for himself to reach. He was preparing himself for stepping into leadership roles that were yet in his unseen future.

Later he became a young officer during WWI. Even then he was put in charge of things usually reserved for older officers. During WWII General Eisenhower was placed in charge of all Allied troop movement in Europe.

Then, after helping to win WWII through his strategic planning, he became our 34th President. He was ready for each advancement because of his teenage preparation for accepting responsibility and showing leadership. Way before he became President Eisenhower, he knew that he had to be the leader in his own life, first.

You and I are the leader of our lives. And each of us are preparing for our future, as well. Each of us is writing our own life’s story one day at a time. There are times when life seems to be overwhelming for any of us. No one’s the exception when it comes to life’s problems. You need to prepare for those times today.

What do we do when we’re overwhelmed with problems? Everyone will have different ideas on this, so I’ll just tell you what I do.

First, I reason with myself that there is a solution to this problem. I include my husband Jeff in the decision making. Maybe I’ll ask a few trusted friends what they would do. I try not to make a “knee jerk” impulse decision about anything.

In decision making or even giving a verbal response, I avoid using those quick responses that come from our amygdala region. This is where our “fight or flight” quick thinking comes from. But, it’s also where a lot of impulsive hateful comments come from.  Or choosing to “flight” rather than solve the situation.

Having a quick response does sometime pay off, though. An example of this is when I was breaking up a small mound of dirt in my yard a few years ago in early Spring. Little did I know that over the winter a copperhead snake had hibernated in that mound. I was fortunate enough to see the tail end of that unmistakable pattern of a venomous snake slither around as the cold air entered its hideaway.

Well, I could’ve, and might should’ve killed it easily enough with my shovel, but I decided since it hadn’t seen me, I ran to the back deck that was close by. “Let it slither off to somewhere else,” I reasoned. I decided in an instant that it was not my “fight moment,” but my “flight moment.” Now, I never saw it or any other snake in my yard since then.

My mother would’ve killed it, though. She grew up on a farm during the Great Depression. She and her siblings were trained to kill a snake whether it was in the garden or the yard. They always had a hoe handy.

My childhood was different than my mother’s even though we were both raised in the country. When my oldest brother, Gene saw a poisonous snake in our yard he killed it. So, I never had to hone my snake killing skills like my mother and her siblings had to.

There are going to be times where you’ll have to choose between equally good decisions. Your ideas will be based upon who you are at your core personality. I did take a risk in not killing the snake. Because once they’re in the yard then they usually come back to that place. But I knew Jeff would mow over it soon enough, anyway.

Sometimes a decision is made based on what seems best to you. It’s nether all that bad or all that great. Either way it’s not going to be earth-shattering. So just go with what seems best in your own reasoning.

I want to make clear that one bad decision doesn’t mean a lifetime of bad decisions. That is if you recognize why you made the bad decision, in the first place. An example of this happened a summer ago to me. I was pulling up to a stop light here in my hometown of Sylva, NC. It’s still a small town, even though it’s grown a bit since my childhood years of growing up near here.

So, the light had just changed to green and I had a few cars in front of me. I was patiently waiting for them all to move forward when a young woman plowed into the back of my SUV with her tiny car. When I looked at it I was amazed that she didn’t go under my Explorer.

Well, I got out to survey the damage and realized she was doing her best to back up and drive off. Hmm, I wondered, “How far she was going to get with the engine ‘sitting in her lap?’” Needless to say she didn’t get far, maybe twenty feet at the most.

So, I called 911 and the police officer that showed up also happens to be my neighbor. We talked a bit privately, then he told me to drive my SUV on home.

Well, that’s when I called Jeff and gave him the “skinny” of it all and asked him to come to where this accident had happened. I didn’t want to drive our Explorer home. So, when he got there, we exchanged vehicles and I drove our Focus home.

Right after the accident, before my neighbor arrived on the scene, I walked over to the other car, (I know, I’m a trusting individual). I was on the phone, so I asked the two women who were still in their tiny car if they needed medical help.

That’s when I observed the obvious. Both the driver and the passenger were intoxicated on drugs, and unable to make clear sense of what just happened. So, I instinctively stepped back and waited for the officer.

Long story short, the local dealership fixed my Explorer perfectly, even though it did take three months to complete it. The body shop manager told me that my tow hitch helped to slow them down some. (And may have saved their lives). Now, we keep the traditional ball hitch in the slot as a precaution.

So, what about the young woman that was driving the tiny car? I found out through my connections that she has had addiction problems in her past. And things weren’t getting better for her.

In my church on Sunday mornings we pass clip boards that have sheets of lined paper on them down each section for people to write their prayer request, or just to add their name, and leave the line blank. These requests are prayed for by our prayer team on another day.

On the Sunday morning after the accident I wrote this young woman’s first name on the prayer list. And I have also prayed for her myself that the unseen chains that have enslaved her are broken. She, like all the rest of us have an amazing life ahead of us. And we just need to get out there and live it.

When you have a tough problem to solve just go to your knees in prayer for answers. And you might not be the only one who is praying for you. When you pray, you will receive an answer just like I’ve received answers to my prayers.